My day was boring as hell, so I'm writing about it, and to spice it up I'm acting as if I'm taking a shot of whiskey after every sentence.

I got to sleep in this morning until eleven, when the cat let me know he really, really needed food. So, I got up and fed him. I tried to go back to sleep, but couldn't. So, I checked my Facebook and my Myspace, and I could tell not much was going on with anyone else, either. Oh, well.

Then, I puttered around the house for a while. Did a couple loads of laundry. Shot rubber bands at the cat. Then, I dressed him up and called him "Suzie" for about an hour. He he...fun.

I got to thinkin' that I hadn't had a good piece of pie in, like, forever. But what place has pie on a Sunday, at least some place that I could get a pie and nothing else without looking like a total freak? Judgmental assholes.

Hang on, gotta put a burrito in the microwave. There, done. I'm trying to finish up a lot of the things in the cupboard, so I'm straining some sauerkraut for a side dish. Where was I? Aw, screw it.

I shoulda done dishes today, but I'm too lazy. What, ya' gonna judge me for that, too? Gonna be like those pie snobs at Village Inn? You're all the same. No, I love you guys. You, anonymous, faceless, internet people.

God, I miss Suzie. Not the Suzie I was pretending my cat was, but a different Suzie. THE Suzie. I haven't talked to her since that "misunderstanding", but I wonder if she thinks of me, and not in that looking over her shoulder in abject fear kinda way. But I've grown since then, don't you think? Don't you think? HEY! I'm talking to-Oh, I forgot...Internet.

I wonder if Whataburger delivers. The burrito and sauerkraut was, well, not probably not the BEST idea, but it wasn't enough. I need to get my jalapeno bacon burger on! I like the Whataburger people. They're good people. Fuck Village Inn.

I want to keep typing, but the text is too small to read. There, that's better. Hey, I can make it all blue! Kick ass. Why am I so tired? Gotta fight through that. Maybe if I focus on the intense pain in my liver right about now that should keep me awake for a whilhnuiojk.,mmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmm

This post was finally published by Fritschie's next door neighbor upon discovery of his unconscious body. Nothing was edited from this post, except about five pages worth of the letter m. Paramedics are en route.