Weekend Update

Friday

My boss grilled burgers and brats for everyone, and it's pretty amazing how productive I can be after stuffing myself to the gills with grilled meat. I had started out the day with a rack of work, and while I didn't get it all done by the end of the day, I left a very manageable amount for Monday morning.

I met some friends for a quick dinner at Umberto's, which is my new favorite pizza place. It's a pity they aren't open for breakfast...pizza joints are so far behind the curve on that million-dollar idea.

Later, we went to the Indie Imporium, a showcase for local folk artists. There was a really cool vibe at that show, with a wide range of styles and products on display. I'm determined to attend more exhibitions like this in an attempt to better connect with the art scene in this town. For so long, I've been doing my own thing and the vast majority of it for my day job. I've been slacking on keeping up with the latest trends out there for the sake of seeing it instead of my usual absorbing just enough to apply to my own work.

After the show, we headed over to Mary's to watch a movie. Her daughter Ivy is a huge Tim Burton fan, so we watched Corpse Bride. I had never seen it, and I really liked it. However, it left me wanting more. The film was much too short for my taste. Granted, there wasn't much more they could do with that story and elaborating any further probably would've made the film drag on, but it's the craftwork of the animation that amazes me.

One thing I kept noticing in the animation was something I've always found funny about human behavior: When you look someone in the eyes, you never really look at both eyes at once. People tend to shift back and forth between eyes. To see that kind of thing animated just killed me. I may not be alone in this, but I become hyper-aware when I find myself shifting from eye to eye, and find myself staring at the bridge of their nose...you know, just to split the difference. Occasionally, the other person subconsciously picks up on it and scratches their nose. Try it sometime, it's kinda freaky.

Saturday

I slept in until about eleven, got dressed and went out to find a Halloween costume. I was thinking about going as a mime, but too much of a costume like that is all about staying in character. I decided to make that my default; if I couldn't find anything else, I'd go as a mime. I looked around this one costume shop and didn't find anything that really spoke to me until I found a little wooden cane. Then, the light bulb went off: Old man Fritschie. I bought the cane, some white hair spray and some spirit gum to glue some wrinkles shut on my face.

I met some friends down on Brookside to watch the parade. I parked at one end of the parade route, they parked at the other end. I met them halfway. They were all on bicycles, so when they wanted to ride somewhere, I had to hoof it. We met back up down my where I parked, then back where we first met, then decided to leave the parade.

So, I had to walk back to my truck and meet back up with them back where they parked. About a minute after we split up, I heard some tires squeeling and turned around to find a jackass in a green Pontiac convertible threatening to get out of his car because my friends weren't giving him enough room to drive through. I ran over there as fast as I could, but they guy was peeling out just as I was getting close. Like I could've done anything if I had been there (got trouble? Send the pacifist.), but it was a noble gesture nonetheless.

I walked back to my truck and quickly realized that my rock star parking job came at a price. I was at the end of the parade route, and in trying to leave, I had to stalk behind the junior ROTC for the last half mile of their route. Once they reached their van, they just stood around. While I'm glad these kids are learning discipline with this group, I just wish they would learn to recognize when a big pickup truck is trying to get around them.

After weaving around the clusterfuck of parked cars through the neighborhood, I met back up with my friends and had lunch. A good time was had by all, and I got home with plenty of time to try a couple of makeup tests before heading to the first party.

The makeup looked good, even though half of my face was glued in some way and facial expressions required special care or else it felt like a bandaid was being ripped off all over the surface of my face. In order to get to the character of an old man, I drove to the first party really slow, listening to Garrison Keiller and with the turn signal on the whole way. The rest was a perfect synthesis of my mood and the character. I could sit down for the whole night, say the craziest shit that came to my mind, even fall asleep, and it was perfectly within the character of a senile old man.

I went to the second party and finished up the night there. I think I had two beers over the course of the night. I wasn't in the mood to get drunk, nor was I looking to do anything other than just hang out. I've learned not to try to get laid on Halloween, even when you're with someone. I mean, I'm all for role-playing, but this is totally different. The last time I got laid on Halloween I was in a relationship, and I couldn't get over the fact that, in essence, Shaggy and Velma was having sex.

So, at one point in the evening, the fire pit was surrounded my Little Red Riding Hood, the Unabomber, the Pharoah and his queen, Smurfette, Dwight from the Office, a cowboy and an old man. Gotta love Halloween!

Sunday

Slept in again, and had to get my ass in gear for yet another pumpkin carving party. I stopped by the store, got supplies and headed over to Mary's where we hung out, carved pumpkins and watched a (you guessed it, Tim Burton marathon. I love hanging out with this crowd because when it come to food, they never fuck around. I wouldn't be surprised if the Food Network is the default channel on everyone's cable box. We all had some really kick-ass enchilada soup and red velvet cake for dessert. I could get used to this warm, fuzzy, stuffed feeling.

So now, I'm back home. I'm full, ready for some couch time, my face is still pretty raw from removing the makeup from last night, and despite having washed my hair about six times, that white hair spray is still in there to some degree. All in all, I'm doing great.