I am soooo ready to nail this guy to the wall

Two weeks ago I turned in the keys to my old apartment. Since then, I have left five messages with them and paid four visits to their office to find out when I'll be getting my security deposit back. None of my messages were returned, and every time I visited the office I was told by the woman running the office that she's waiting for her next meeting with her boss to discuss the issue.

My visit yesterday afternoon shed a little more light on the source of the logjam. After hearing from this woman for the fourth time that she's still waiting to meet with her boss I asked her when he'll be in the office next time.

Her response (which is priceless) was, "This office?"

Oh, so he's one of those guys that has many, many businesses and this rental agency is one of the red-headed stepchildren! Great!

After fighting the temptation to laugh my ass off in frustration, I said, "Let me rephrase the question. When was the last time he was in this office?"

"I wanna say...the end of December." she replied with a sympathetic look.

My right eye starts to twitch. "Okay, let me ask you another question. Why is it that you can't just cut me a check?"

"Because I'm not allowed."

"Is there someone else here that is allowed to cut me a check?"

"No. I'm the only employee."

"Here?"

"No, the only employee, period. And I can't cut you a check."

In a way, that makes sense. Their last office manager stole a bunch of money from them, so I somewhat understand this guy's hesitance to allow anyone to touch his company's money. But then again, if he trusts the new manager to take in payments in cash and money orders, hand over keys to his properties to people who are, let's face it, barely eligible to get a room at the YMCA, why the hell can't she authorize a damned check? Do any of their bills ever get paid?

I left my name and number (again) and promised to keep returning until I get my money back.

This is gonna be fun. I knew going into that lease that this rental agency was gonna try to screw me over, big time. They tried, twice, while I was living there, and failed both times. Now, the stall tactics are only strengthening my resolve. The game is afoot.

My next move came to me this afternoon. I remembered the letter back in November wherein they threatened to fine me a hundred bucks if I didn't remove the items from my "balcony". The number I called to ask them which of the two items on my front porch offended them, the ashtray of the dead potted plant...the phone number on the letter itself, was the head honcho's cell number! My idea: Find that letter and call that number.

Four rings and I get this computerized message: "The voice mail box for" (woman's voicesays the leasing company's name) "...is full. If you'd like to page this person press 5 now-"

I jam my thumb down on the five key so hard it could have broken the phone. After a few seconds, I get the computer voice again, "The customer you are trying to page is unavailable, if you'd like to leave a message, press 5 now."

I hang up.

My next visit to the office will be tomorrow afternoon, and every Monday, Wednesday and Friday until I get my money back. I will not mention the words "my attorney" until next week, the words "Better Business Bureau" until the next week, and "small claims court" the week after that.

I'm so ready to fight this guy. This is gonna be fun.