Downs, ups, downs

It wasn't the best day to try to make demands at work...or to make requests...or breathe too heavily for that matter. My boss was in one of his moods, and I almost - ALMOST - got in his face about it, but decided not to. Wise decision.

I finally got caught up on my work this afternoon. It felt really good to be able to take a moment to breathe and count to ten. I even got a chance to leave a half-hour early to visit my friends Karen and Nathan at the hospital. Their daughter was born today at 12:42 pm. Interesting note, Baby Lexi was born at a hospital on old Route 66, and she weighed 6 pounds, 6 ounces.

When it was time for the baby to be fed, I was reminded of my steadily dropping blood sugar, so I excused myself to leave. I grabbed a burger at the slowest Braums in the known universe. You know it's a slow drive thru if you can smoke an entire cigarette before you decide you might as well but the car in park for the remaining ten minutes it'll take for the food to be ready. While I commend Braums for their policy of hiring the mentally challenged, but shouldn't they draw a line at the comatose? Every time I go to this one Braums, all of the employees look like there was a gas leak in there. Oh, well, the bacon cheeseburger was good, gas leak or no gas leak.

Then came the most humbling part of the month: paying bills. I am so getting screwed by Consumer Credit Counseling. Four years, and I'm hardly making a dent. I made the mistake of calling my mom and she's now kicking into hyper-problem-solver mode. She's suggesting research into other solutions even when I want to forget about it for the night. I want to get myself on track as soon as possible, but I'm kinda stuck. Bankruptcy laws have made it too difficult for me to just throw myself on the mercy court. I can't get any kind of loan without a better credit rating and I can't get a better credit rating without money that I can't seem to make at this point in my life.

To compound things, all my work on that time machine, so I can go back and beat the crap out of myself for thinking that pre-approval for platinum status was a good thing, have yielded no results. The best I can achieve is going back only a few seconds, just long enough to tell myself that it didn't work, so don't bother.

This whole square two thing is a real bitch, you know?