Friday night refinement

Another trend on the blog: Re-reading what I drunkenly wrote Thursday night and refining it with a sober mind.

I love my friends, don't get me wrong. They think I'm a really great guy who deserves any and all happiness in the world. To that end, almost every one of them is trying to hook me up with a date, and they're not gonna let a little thing like nothing in common get in the way.

I've given it a lot of thought today, and I'm gonna take myself out of dating circulation for a while. Here's why:

1. I'm still living with my ex-girlfriend, sleeping on a twin sized bed in a room that faintly smells of cat urine...not exactly chick magnet material. Why don't I just find my own place? Because rent is cheap, my ex and I are on great terms, and I'm flat broke. All of these things have become a symbiont circle Anything I do at this juncture to change any of them would throw the others into complete upheaval. If I move, I'll be even more broke, the bed belongs to Candy, so I won't have a place to sleep...see where this is going?

2. While I don't blame the women who've come into my life in recent years, I do have to concede that they are symptoms of a much larger problem with me. I understand that women want to be pursued. I've just gotten fed up with having to chase what never wants to get caught. I'm 29 years old, for fuck's sake. At this point in my life, this should be a game of tag, not cross-country hide and seek.

3. In light of recent events, I am so fucking confused about what exactly I'm looking for that if Ms. Right crossed my path at this very moment, I wouldn't even know it.

4. If there's any truth to the idea that true love comes when you're not looking for it, so be it.

5. Many people have told me that all I need is to get laid. However, I'm just not built for casual sex. It is a hollow, meaningless waste of my time if I don't have some sort of emotional and/or intellectual connection to a woman. It's a catch-22. I can't have one without the other, so I'll have to go with neither.

So fuck you, universe! I'm not happy with the rules of the game, and I'm taking my place on the bench until the ref rules in my favor. You'd think this would be a tough decision, but it's really not. And from what I've gone through in the past few months, I have a feeling I'm not breaking a lot of hearts over this.